The following tips will help you communicate more effectively with your employees:

1. Let employees know that having feelings is okay. Feelings are facts and need to be dealt with.

2. Praise in public, criticize in private. Nothing improves a person's behavior better than well-timed, sincere, and justified praise. Nothing builds resentment faster than being yelled at in front of others.

3. Listen to employees and accept suggestions. It's easier to give advice than to receive it, but you don't learn much listening only to yourself.

4. Pay as much attention to how you say something as to what you say. Begin the conversation with a positive comment and/or statement that shows you are empathizing with the individual. Be sure your face says the same thing as your words.

5. Refrain from saying "should," "ought," and "don't." When you give advice or directions do it directly and politely. "Please take this material to the front office." It sometimes helps to phrase things as questions: "Have you thought about doing it this way?" "What if we did this. . .?" Use "I" or "me" statements: "I do it this way" "I try to. . ." In response to incorrect behaviors express your feelings rather than blaming: "I'm bothered when you do that. It makes me feel . . .".

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CEO, A.E. Schwartz & Associates, Boston, MA., a comprehensive organization which offers over 40 skills based management training programs. Mr. Schwartz conducts over 150 programs annually for clients in industry, research, technology, government, Fortune 100/500 companies, and nonprofit organizations worldwide. He is often found at conferences as a key note presenter and/or facilitator. His style is fast-paced, participatory, practical, and humorous. He has authored over 65 books and products, and taught/lectured at over a dozen colleges and universities throughout the United States.